I Am Wondering…

One of my greatest lessons of 2019 was not necessarily an aha! moment, but more like a weaving together of many different understandings that at one point merged together into the fabric of my being – and then I couldn’t not see it. I couldn’t not be it. I couldn’t not live it.

Experience has taught me over these last years that anytime I adopted a belief system that was strict, or with attached morality to it, things would come crashing down. Either I would have to keep feeding myself those beliefs in order to continue going (which then included preaching about them and controlling others to do the same), or I would have to face that it created stigma, separation and that in the end, it wasn’t good for me.

Some of my personal experiences that made me feel controlling (of myself or others) are: some form of spiritual beliefs, diets (more specially the ketogenic diet – never again!), and the all natural path (yes, I now use products that contain silicone, and chemicals, sorry, not sorry).

So… the lesson for me is: never ever to adopt a dogmatic belief system. I hope to always remember this, and to never again fall into its trap. I wrote a poem a while ago that celebrated that feeling:



My Dear Vitality
Help me to stay clear from Dogma
As it paralyses my thinking
And it gives rise to judgment
Why is it so easy to fall into its embrace
A comfortable, fitting place
In between all the crowds
Believing I belong to one
But I know the insecurity it brings
I know I do not truly belong
I do not truly fit in
I am unique flow
And Dogma has no place
In my changing Heart
As it feels like a cage
For someone who wants to fly


So, I am wondering… What have you learned about yourself, about your ways, that has brought you change? I would love to hear your story, your perspective. What have you added to your book of knowledge?


Happy New year! 2020 – here we are.